We long to belong...and suffer to have the love we need.

Feb 22, 2024
Closeup of an elephant walking on the savanna of Amboseli National Park, Kenya, Africa

Life is moving fast in this new age and the pressures of expectations to have it all together are enormous in a world that is changing moment by moment. It is hard to find stability in a world that seems to be unravelling and  hard to know who and what to trust.It’s imperative to get a hold of ourselves in a time of heightened anxiety, depression and overwhelm. 

As we struggle to do everything we’re “supposed” to do, we experience fleeting satisfaction or fulfilment. We are conditioned to adapt to and manage the external world, its expectations and demands. Our reptilian brains are powerful in stressing the survival imperative—a throwback to our time on the Savana as early humans. The cost of mere survival however, means ignoring, even abandoning our authentic self. In the modern day, the survival agenda takes on more subtle iteration as we succumb to the social conditioning we receive in our families and societies in order to belong to the whole. So, we lose touch with our deep inner knowing and soul’s wisdom which connects us to Divine wisdom and Guidance. We end up “ missing” ourselves and our inner compass which guides us to our true north.

We live what we learned as children. The personality we think of as “ I “ and “me”  is largely a construct made up of reactions to experiences and events in our lives. The emotions, perceptions, beliefs and behaviours we then adopt, often as defence mechanisms, drive us unconsciously and often keep us stuck in the impact of past wounds and pain. When we unwrap and release  layers of defences and false faces we have adopted in order to survive, belong and get the love we need, we find our true unique deep self, the original spark of life connected to the Divine that is here to experience this  earth journey. 

Family Constellations philosophy, now backed by the latest epigenetic research, has revealed that  we also inherit layers of ancestral traumas passed down through our lineage  for resolution. So, not only are we carrying our own repressed traumas and rejected aspects of our nature which lead to unhealthy defensive patterns, but we are also unconsciously, carrying the repressed or ignored traumas and negative life experiences of our ancestors.Those skeletons in our proverbial family closet are actually living through us. After they end up banging on the closet door for our attention, acknowledgment, acceptance, and a resolution.

We pay a heavy mental, emotional and spiritual price for ignoring our soul’s mission, the judged and disowned aspects of our nature, our unrequited longings and repressed pain.When We are able to salmon with the courage to explore, discover and own our authenticity, we free ourselves to live our true purpose to fulfilment in this life. When we align with the beauty of our soul essence, the hidden  jewel which lives and shines through our physical and psychological bodies, we experience the self acceptance and Guidance we need to navigate the chaotic climate of this world on our unique soul’s journey.

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